it is within you

A blanket response to all the women who have e-mailed me lately looking for relationship advice:

I don’t know why it is that women will stay in hurtful, dead or downright abusive relationships for as long as they do. “But I love him!” they moan.

[I’m lying. Of course I know why. I used to be the exact same way. I abused myself over and over in bad relationships, and it took me a HELL of a long time to figure out that I love myself too damn much to allow it to ever happen again.]

Now, listen to me closely: If you stay with a man who is treating you like shit just because you love him then you deserve everything you get.

I’m not talking about the usual squabbles between a man and a woman. I mean when you’re describing your relationship to others for some kind of confirmation and even to your own, biased ears it sounds horrifying.

If you’re at this point, you already know he’s treating you like shit.
The question is: why are you still letting him?

You, none of you, need my help, my advice, my opinions. Everything you need is already inside you. Go. Spend some time inside. I promise. You’ll figure it out.