herdesires - diary - cybersex for the male

diary: cybersex for the male

I have to admit, I'm not so much into cybersex. At least not the full-on, beginning to end, "I'm pretending I'm licking your hot hard cock..." kind of cybersex. Yes, I've done it. Yeah, I'll probably do it again. But it's not my preference. I prefer my online exchanges to titillate, to entice, and to make the damn man want to drive over here and slip it to me for real!

Oops, that last bit kind of popped out. *grin* But you know what I mean.

That said, seems like men really have the short end of the stick (ahem) when it comes to cybersex. I mean, my best cyber episodes were when I slipped a pair of panties on, slid my little bullet vibe in between my legs, and typed freely with both hands the whole damn time I was climbing the walls. But you boys, really, you have to type one handed and then there's the whole breaking the computer thing...

Whoa, whoa, I hear you saying. The breaking the computer thing?

Poor Jonathan Quince describes it best:

[I]n the moments after climax, I became, shall we say, a bit careless with the liquid results of my passions. That's right: I rendered a $2,800 computer inoperable by jerking off on it. Just call me talented.

Oh, I needed a good laugh like that today. Thanks Jonathan!

2004.01.31 05:48 AM
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comments on this entry

That'll be a tough one to explain at the repair shop. :-p

— posted by: JL on January 31, 2004 11:15 AM

I am a happy lurker ususally, but this drove me to write. There is now way that this true. One would have to have the capacity of Godzilla to "drown" a PC. I learned the hard way that a PC can stand in two inches of water and still operate quite nicely. Even depositing on a keyboard would just cause a new $59 keyboard at worst.
Maybe I'm too literal?
Bearfree

— posted by: BearFree on February 1, 2004 4:08 AM

I have to agree with Bearfree. The guy must cum like a horse to drown a computer and the only way it would affect the computer is if it was a laptop where it is an all-in-one unit. Nice story though.

while it's a little awkward for the guy to stay aroused we dont seem to mind trying to perfect the art :-)

— posted by: jim on February 1, 2004 9:41 AM

Gosh, doesn't anybody read? :) The first words in the post I linked to are:

"My laptop is broken, thanks to a particularly wild night of cybersex."

Yes, he's talking about a laptop. How naïve do you all think I am? :)

— posted by: Vikki on February 1, 2004 11:16 AM

*snicker* this is tooo funny. You're missing the big picture. Questioning the quantity of semen ejaculated onto a computer (laptop, as has been pointed out) isn't as funny as watching people DEBATE whether the quantity of semen is sufficient to render a computer useless.

And I thought I had no life (wait- I don't.. I'm responding to this too! ROFL)

— posted by: Poni on February 2, 2004 1:03 AM

The only part I read was your quote from the other blog so, no, I did not realize it was a laptop.

— posted by: jim on February 2, 2004 7:29 AM

Jeez - they'er all talking about computers and the note was about sex. Yuck!

— posted by: Eric George on February 2, 2004 12:11 PM

Cybersex is a pretty empty experience, but as empty experiences go.... it's a pretty good one. And a pleasant way to pass the time. If you can strike up a passing relationship with a horny person at the other end and by fuelling their fantasies give them one or more explosive orgasms, well, you've done your good deed for the day. And what could be wrong with that?

— posted by: Eric George on February 3, 2004 3:39 AM

well i can't say that i have ever "broken" a computer or anything like that. but yes, typing with a single hand does suck!

— posted by: matt on February 3, 2004 11:32 AM

Too funny, and what a great mental image. Just wanted to say how much I'm really enjoying your blog. Thanks for the laugh!

— posted by: Aderys on February 5, 2004 3:44 AM

Ok, I don't know what is making me laugh harder, the original post or these comments! :)

— posted by: Just Me on February 6, 2004 2:00 AM

eh i kinda got some on my laptop touch pad and the right click mouse built in oh god! its a vaio i wiped it off but some is in i got a tooth pick to get it out :( i got most of it out, will there be any damamge?

— posted by: some dude on December 29, 2004 2:33 PM